It Ends With Us

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It Ends With Us by Colleen Hoover

I am dedicating my very first post to this book because after I starting and finishing it yesterday, I had to get my thoughts about it out. But the question became, where do I share my opinions? Do the good people of Goodreads really want to hear what I have to say about it? Why don’t I have a blog of my own where I can say what I want about what I want and no one can complain? So voila. Welcome to The Coffeephile Diaries.

Goddammit. CoHo does it again. It was 11:59 pm and I was staring at the clock, anxiously waiting for the numbers to change to 12:00 am. IPad in hand, Kindle app open, finger on the sync button. The moment those numbers changed I was pressing the sync button repeatedly, waiting for the much anticipated cover that had been plaguing my Instagram, Facebook and Twitter feeds for months, to show up on my library shelf, ready to be downloaded and devoured.

As luck would have it, or maybe it wasn’t luck at all but the time change between America and France, it was 1 am and still no book on the shelf. Knowing I had to get up early, I thought it best to give the app, my finger, and myself a rest from the constant syncing and go to sleep, eagerly awaiting, probably for the first time in my life, the early morning to come.

8 am finally rolls around, yes for a non-morning person like myself that is early, and the first thing I do is click that damn sync button, wait a couple seconds while it does its thing and… THERE IT WAS! Now, it’s times like these where I wish I had a real job to which I could call in sick and spend the day reading. But I don’t. I live with the family I work with. So forcing the kids to play together in their playroom and to leave me alone, I poured myself a bowl of coffee, and dove in.

Now, I’ve read 12 CoHo books. So I knew going in that I was in for some heartbreak and tears. But nothing, NOTHING, could have prepared me for the roller coaster of emotions that I was about to go on.

Let’s dive into this book, shall we? I don’t want to divulge too much of the story but I have to say  **SPOILER ALERT**

The book is written in the POV of Lily, a girl in her twenties that right off the bat, is trying to deal with her abusive fathers death when she meets Ryle, a seemingly sweet neurosurgeon who wants completely different things than her. Ryle wants to be the very best in his field, therefore putting his career above everything and everyone, never commits to anything more serious than a one-night stand. Lily wants the complete opposite. She wants a boyfriend, a relationship, a marriage and someday, kids. And after divulging this information to each other on the very night they meet, they decide it would be best to stay away from each other, easy thing to do since they met happenstantially. (But what kind of story would this be if they never got together?) So after succeeding for 6 months of not seeing each other, their paths cross again. After a few more meetings, they confess that neither is able to put the other out of their minds. Ryle decides he can be in a relationship with her, because being away from her is simply too hard. Everything is going swimmingly (if you read the book, that there? Pun intended) until it isn’t. Lily, after seeing what her father did to her mother during all those years, promises herself that she would never be like her mother and stay with anyone who hit her. Only that was easy to say when she was on the outside looking in. She was now on the inside. What would she do? Would she stay with Ryle and hope it never happens again? What would she do when it happened again? And again?

Obviously everyone’s situation in life is different, so naturally this story will affect everyone differently. I have never been, nor have I known anyone, in an abusive relationship, so to say that I was shocked to feel what I was feeling would be an understatement. I found myself continually clutching at my pounding chest, sobbing uncontrollably, unable to read the words on the screen past the tears pooling in my eyes. Colleen had managed, in the most powerful way, to turn me into Lily. I felt what she felt. When he was hitting her, he was hitting me. When Lily was forgiving Ryle, I was forgiving Ryle. But you want to know what the worst part of the book was? The authors note, which is usually placed at the beginning of the book, was placed at the end and in which Colleen explains that this story was inspired by the story of her parents. Her father beat her mother. This heart-wrenching story is partly non fiction. Holy.

So to end this. If you haven’t experienced the heartbreak that is Colleen Hoover’s mind, I strongly suggest start. All her books are wonderful but my favorites are It Ends With Us, Ugly Love and November 9. I strongly recommend reading at least these 3. If you need me, I’ll be here waiting impatiently for her next book.

 

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